PRESS PACK

The “PRESS PACK” above is a PDF written by Julie Bindel to help journalists cover stories on prostitution and human trafficking with sensitivity and ethics.  The guide reminds the media to be responsible and understand the horrors experienced by these women, and to discontinue portraying ‘prostitutes’ as criminals who do no deserve sympathy – as compared to ‘victims of human trafficking.’

According to the Palermo Protocol, consent is irrelevant in both trafficking and prostitution.

Rationale: When prostituted women ‘appear’ to have made such a choice freely, in the perspective of the exploited women, it is nearly always their only option for financial survival. Which educated, psychologically-healthy woman would choose prostitution over other career options if they were not in a desperate situation?  Furthermore, ‘choosing prostitution’ at the onset does not negate the damage that is done to the body, mind and soul of the woman  - even if she handles her own transactions. And 95% of women who began handling their own transactions end up in the hands of pimps and traffickers anyway.

Similarly, if women in polygamy appear to freely make the choice to ‘live the principle,’ in their minds, they have no other reasonable alternative. And does making the choice to become a polygamist wife take away the inequality, loneliness, poverty, and exploitation that takes place throughout her life?  Of course not. When you read the Guidelines for Journalists, apply the same sensitivity and principles to the women of polygamy.

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It is well known that typically prostituted women are some of the most disenfranchised, vulnerable and exploitable women in society. Even if they entered prostitution as “consenting adults”, 82% had been physically assaulted; 83% had been threatened with a weapon; 68% had been raped while working as prostitutes; and 84% reported current or past homelessness. Raymond, D’Cunha, et al. (2002) found that 80% of women who had been trafficked or prostituted suffered violence-related injuries in prostitution. Among the women interviewed by Parriott (1994), 85% had been raped in prostitution. One US survey found that almost 90% of women involved would leave if they could, but they did not have other options for economic survival. In fact, interviews with more than 600 women found that almost all wanted to leave prostitution (www.prostitutionresearch.com).

Where are the statistics on the women in polygamy? If a society is so secret that such surveys are disallowed, what is it they are hiding?

Life in prostitution has a body of data. Pheterson (1996) summarized the health problems of women in prostitution: exhaustion, frequent viral illness, STDs, vaginal infections, back aches, sleeplessness, depression, headaches, stomachaches, and eating disorders. A Canadian commission found that the death rate of women in prostitution was 40 times higher than that of the general population (Special Committee on Pornography and Prostitution, 1985). Amortality survey of more than 1,600 women in U.S. prostitution noted that “no population of women studied previously has had a . . . percentage of deaths due to murder even approximating those observed in our cohort” (Potterat et al., 2004, p. 783).

To think that prostitutes deserve no sympathy from the media because they “consented as adults” is preposterous. The country of Sweden knows this. All prostitutes are considered victims, bar none. They are never arrested, they are always provided services and support.  However, the criminals are the men who buy them, control them, and abuse them.  In polygamy, the men who marry women over 18 are rarely considered criminals. In fact, the men are too often portrayed as wholesome, hard-working men who are persecuted for simply living their religion.

The wives, because of their beliefs, do not even believe they are victims. In the minds of Mormon-based polygamy, the women see themselves as righteous, serving God, serving their husbands so they can be worthy of “having their callings and elections made sure” (which means being visited by God on earth). Then they will be worthy of becoming “mothers in heaven.” These women are living in a false reality. Brainwashed. They are victims who agree to their own oppression and are happy about it. Yet, as every woman who exits polygamy will attest, behind closed doors, those smiling, selfless, pure-hearted angels – whether in pioneer dresses or clothes from Forever 21 – cry and cry. They live in a shadowy mess of sadness and pain they are not allowed to feel, let alone broadcast. So they numb themselves.

Most likely, the sweet angel woman will admit some hardship. A little is OK.  She will offer tokens of acknowledgment:

“Don’t get me wrong, it’s not all a bed of roses…”

“There are times when it’s really difficult…”

“I admit there are issues with jealousy, when I wonder why God would want this for women…”

But she probably won’t want to dwell on it or you might open the floodgates of emotion in streaming HD.  Instead, expect the discussion to return to talking about the blessings of free child care, sister-wives who are best friends, the peace and joy in their lives, how fabulous it is to know their husband isn’t out collecting mistresses, and the glory in store for those who live the principle righteously as it was meant to be lived.

In submission. It’s a rare and extraordinary woman in the lifestyle who will dare admit to an outsider that she is being abused by her husband or by a sister-wife.  After all, suffering is what God wants as part of the repentance process. I remember. I had to go through the repentance process, the refiner’s fire, to have my faith tested. I consented to my own abuse (or so I thought), to do whatever was required of me to prove my humility and worthiness to God. For me, it was akin to torture.

Worse yet, it was a torture that I had to pretend I loved, and even provide evidence thereof.  And if I told, there would be consequences. But guess what?

I did tell.

And sure enough, there WERE consequences. That’s why I use a psuedonym. Although it’s been a few years, there is a part of me that is still afraid.

Then I learned that a woman can not ‘legally’ consent to her own abuse or torture, let alone enslavement. A physician caring for migrant workers, including prostitutes, said “It is not possible to protect the health of someone whose “job” means that they will get raped on average once a week (Hunter, 1993). One woman explained that prostitution is “like domestic violence taken to the extreme” (Leone, 2001). Another woman said, “What is rape for others, is normal for us” (Farley, Lynne, & Cotton, in press). Suffering is part of the job.

Yes, the sister wives are smiling angels with pure hearts who are simply trying to live their religion.  But please journalists, do not forget what all the women who exit polygamy will attest: that behind closed doors, they live in the culture of tears. Yet, because of their beliefs, most do not consider themselves victims. Suffering is part of the job.

Remember the words of Julie Bindel and apply them to polygamy.

“The fact that some women know they will be engaged in the sex industry does not mean that they are not the victims of sexual abuse and human rights violations,” states Julie Bindel. Too often journalists report trafficking cases as if trafficking and prostitution are completely distinct from each other with trafficked women being referred to as “sex slaves,” while prostituted women referred to “prostitutes” and “hookers.”  The distinction gives a clear message that trafficked women are “real victims” and “prostitutes” are choosing their “lifestyle” and deserve no sympathy.

A woman may enter polygamy as a “consenting adult” in the same way a prostitute may initially ‘consent’ to selling her body. So what? In most cases, both are being exploited for the benefit of an intimidating male who is in control of her sex life, her money, her whereabouts, her life conditions and activities.

Granted, there are surely cases of fine men who are kind to their wives, who do not abuse them, who allow them independence, and who do not molest children.  No doubt, there must be women who actually ARE sincerely happy when they say so– at least in some ways and at certain times. Regardless, the women in polygamy are still unequal and they must fight the pain of sharing their husband affections.

Furthermore, women who find the courage to leave the immersive lifestyle repeat a similar statement – that they did not know a single woman who was truly happy.

I hope one day you journalists will start writing stories about the fact that the “consenting adult women” of polygamy and prostitution are also often victims of male oppression and violence.

The Palermo Protocol states that “the consent of the victim is irrelevant; that facilitating…women for prostitution…constitutes trafficking, and that governments have a responsibility to tackle the demand for prostitution.” Similar laws need to made to safeguard women in polygamy and other cults as well.

“We, the survivors of prostitution and trafficking gathered at this press conference today, declare that prostitution is violence against women. Women in prostitution do not wake up one day and “choose” to be prostitutes. It is chosen for us by poverty, past sexual abuse, the pimps who take advantage of our vulnerabilities, and the men who buy us for the sex of prostitution.” (Manifesto, Joint CATW-EWL Press Conference, 2005)

And so it is with polygamy. One day, media, I hope you stop sugar-coating the lifestyle and help society understand what is really happening: many women living the principle are adult victims of human trafficking – disguised as polygamy.

And the United States of America does nothing to stop the slavery of this class of citizens.