After Polygamy

After exiting a polygamist cult, a woman may experience a period of intense and often conflicting emotions. She may feel relieved, maybe even euphoric, to be free to think for herself and make decisions about her life. At the same time, she also may feel grief over what she perceives as the loss of her eternal standing, her religion or faith, her friendships, her life purpose which used to be so clearly defined. The emotional rollercoaster during this time is often characterized by “post-cult trauma syndrome.”  It includes:

  1. Spontaneous crying
  2. Sense of loss
  3. Depression & suicidal thoughts
  4. Fear that not obeying the prophet’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation
  5. Loneliness, alienation from family, friends
  6. Sense of isolation, rejection due to being surrounded by people who judge rather than understand
  7. Fear of evil and darkness taking over one’s life
  8. Scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance
  9. Panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances
  10. Fear of going insane
  11. Confusion about right and wrong
  12. Sexual conflicts

FROM  Margaret Thaler Singer, Ph.D.

Some return to polygamy because the discomfort, lack or resources and lack of understanding is just too great. But for those who do not, the following may be experienced for years:

  1. Flashbacks to cult or polygamy life
  2. Simplistic black-white thinking
  3. Sense of unreality, feeling “out of it”
  4. Suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-events
  5. Disassociation (spacing out)
  6. Depression and a sense of alienation, loneliness
  7. “Stockholm Syndrome”: knee-jerk impulses to defend the prophet or group when it is criticized, even if they hurt the person
  8. Difficulty concentrating
  9. Incapacity to make decisions
  10. Commitment phobia, fear of joining groups
  11. Distrust of professional services
  12. Hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticizes the prophet or toward the group itself
  13. Mental confusion
  14. Unwarranted guilt
  15. Low self-esteem, low self-confidence, self-loathing and severe regret
  16. Distrust of self in making good choices
  17. Dread of running into a someone from the past
  18. Dread of being cursed or condemned by the prophet, group or cult
  19. Loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks
  20. Hang-overs of habitual religious behaviors
  21. Difficulty managing time
  22. Trouble holding down a job
  23. Problems in reactivating a value system to live by

Most of these symptoms will eventuallysubside as the victim mainstreams into everyday routines of normal life.  ADAPTED FROM http://pseudo-prophet.tripod.com/sideeffects.html (Dr. Margaret Thaler Singer, Cults in Our Midst, p. 296)

Dealing with all the psychological aftermath proved to be the most soul-wrenching, excruciating, experience of my life. Contributing greatly to this assessment is the fact that during that intense and turbulent time, I had no idea why I was suffering, although I could describe my symptoms.  If someone had only explained to me that what I was going through was “normal” and that I wasn’t “losing my mind” or “cracking up” as many former cultists have expressed, it would have facilitated a faster recovery. – Janis Hutchinson

Paul Martin, the director of a recovery center for victims of cultic abuse, wrote that victims of cults, and this includes polygamist cults -

have been traumatized, deceived, conned, used and often emotionally, physically, sexually, and mentally abused while serving the group and/or the leader. Like other trauma victims (for example, of criminal acts, rape, and serious illness), former cultists often reexperience the painful memories of their group involvement.”  READ MORE HERE

He compares the person who was left the group to someone who has escaped prison camp, stating that those who get out often utilize a “captivity narrative” that “emphasizes manipulation, entrapment and being victims of ‘sinister cult practices’. These narratives provide a rationale for a ‘hostage-rescue’ motif, in which cults are likened to POW camps and deprogramming as heroic hostage rescue efforts.”

  1. Spontaneous crying
  2. Sense of loss
  3. Depression & suicidal thoughts
  4. Fear that not obeying the prophet’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation
  5. Loneliness, alienation from family, friends
  6. Sense of isolation, rejection due to being surrounded by people who judge rather than understand
  7. Fear of evil spirits taking over one’s life outside the cult
  8. Scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance
  9. Panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances
  10. Eating disorders, over-eating, weight gain, weight loss
  11. Fear of going insane
  12. Confusion about right and wrong
  13. Revictimization by law enforcement
  14. Fear of anything to do with religion
  15. Grief over personal losses
  16. Fear of retribution
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Human Trafficking

Human trafficking is the recruitment, transportation, transfer, harbouring or receipt of persons, by means of the threat or use of force or other forms of coercion, of abduction, of fraud, of deception, of the abuse of power or of a position of vulnerability or of the giving or receiving of payments or benefits to achieve the consent of a person having control over another person, for the purpose of exploitation.

From the United Nations Web Site Here

Press for Change

Human rights activist Julie Bindel wrote a guide to help journalists cover stories on prostitution and human trafficking with sensitivity and ethics. The same care should be taken when writing stories about the survivors of polygamy and other high-demand groups (cults.)

Download the Guidelines for Journalists & Bloggers HERE.